[Author’s note: While a staff member, I wrote the following for the Findhorn Foundation website, we have not been able to add the lovely photos by Sverre Koxvold which were on the website but we hope that we will get them in due course. In the meantime if you have any photos from the Gathering and are happy to share them – please Contact Us.]

Into Christ Consciousness Gathering – Day 1 (8 April 2012)

Sitting on the bus as we pull away from Cluny for the short journey to The Park, I am filled with gratitude for the opportunity I have been given to attend this four-day gathering. The angel of Expectancy is my companion. I read in the conference guide that Easter Saturday is the day of emptiness. Engaging in conversation with the woman next to me, and being aware of the other conversations around me, the idea of emptiness somehow seems contradictory.

We enter a beautifully decorated Universal Hall to the sound of gentle flute music. At the front of the Hall, a golden six-pointed star hanging overhead, are wooden tubs overflowing with sunny yellow daffodils, lush trees standing tall in their pots, and a moss and flower-covered centrepiece in which Pan and the nature spirits dance amongst the elements and welcome us.

Gillian Paschkes-Bell, one of the Gathering’s conveners, invites us to welcome one another. And to welcome the Christ presence .. cosmic… incarnated… in our hearts. We are here to build an energetic chalice so that the Christ impulse can enter into this world through us.

In recognition that we are coming from different faith traditions, we are asked to honour the differences, knowing that at a deeper level there is oneness. And to honour the ancestors for creating the traditions that have held us, and to forgive the ancestors for using those same traditions to suppress us.

We begin to create the chalice, Barbara Swetina leading us in song –

When two or more are gathered together in my name,
Then there I AM forever amongst you.

The old form is dissolving so that spirit can enter and create new forms. The essence of Easter is renewal; the keynote of the Gathering is awakening. Janice Dolley, co convener, speaks to us of going from the mind into the heart, for in the heart is to be found perception, compassion and a deeper connection with one another. She quotes James Redfield’s Twelfth Insight in which he indicates that the new will come from many, many conscious conversations. We are invited to engage in these conversations with one another throughout the Gathering.

Gillian then turns us towards one of the themes for the Gathering – going through the fear barrier. Facing fear, moving through it and going beyond it into freedom. She asks if we are willing to look at the things that block each of us from the abundance of our own potentiality. She invites us to symbolically use a stone of our own choosing to give form to working with an energetic practice for releasing a block which feels most in the way for each of us at this time. This ritual, begun today, will be completed at the dawn ceremony tomorrow.

Before being led by Micaela Aminoff into a meditation to identify what our individual block is, we again join in song with Barbara, the first song to honour our ancestors and recognise how truly blessed we are, and the second to remember that we are healing the world one heart at a time. After the singing, the atmosphere in the Hall is one of peace and stillness – perfect for going into meditation. As she starts, Micaela invokes the grace of Transformation.

We end our afternoon together by taking to the floor and walking around while looking into each other’s eyes. In the background the song I See the Christ in You by The Waterboys is playing. My heart and hands reach out to the men and women whose eyes meet mine.

The evening’s session with Philip Roderick and Julia Macdonald helps me begin to understand the meaning of the emptiness as it relates to the Easter mystery. As he plays his hang drum, producing exquisite sounds, Philip talks of how it’s the emptiness of this steel structure that allows it to resonate. How, by emptying ourselves of ourselves, we can be filled.

He connects us through drumming and body prayer with the suffering of those who are in the tomb or waiting by the tomb, and those who are excluded and long to belong. We reach out to our brothers and sisters to bring them love and healing. We are then bathed in the soothing, yet strange and unfamiliar sound of a newly translated version of the Lord’s Prayer sung in Aramaic.

Julia MacDonald steps up to the podium and shares with us her nine-year journey into the silence and stillness, which began when she went from being energetic, enthusiastic and full of vitality to being bedridden and unable to look after herself due to a severe medical condition. The hours, days and weeks she spent moving deeper into the silence led her to be able to walk again and to create a new life, a new birth. At the end of those nine years, her consultant considered her to be a ’walking miracle’.

With Philip drumming on a cardboard box, and Barbara accompanying on guitar, we chant, “We are Mary, we are Yeshua, we are the disciple who Jesus loved.” I am moved to tears, almost sobbing, as I repeat these words over and over.

We end the evening by moving into the silence, helped along by the resonant sounds of Philip’s hang drum. We have been asked to keep the silence throughout the night, only breaking it when we greet the sun at dawn tomorrow. I leave the Hall wrapped in stillness, my heart opening to receive…

Into Christ Consciousness Gathering – Day 2 (9 April 2012)

I awake at 5:30 this morning, pull on my clothes and join a circle of approximately 60 fellow participants in the carpark at Cluny for the dawn ceremony. The birds, who were awake long before me, are singing their greeting to the world. Among them an owl, a bird which in some traditions symbolises death and transformation. I feel blessed by its presence.

Micaela Aminoff and her team create the container for this ceremony where each one of us will have the opportunity to release the old and become filled with the new. To the beat of Micaela’s drum, we slowly proceed from the back of Cluny up the hill to the power point. I carry with me my symbolic stone and an unlit candle. I walk, aware of the person in front of me, and aware of the block which I wish to release. Near to the top, just before a portal created by two trees, is the place where our stones can be left, our blocks released. I step through into the new.

The drumming stops and a gong sounds – the first candle has been lit from the fire at the top. One by one we pass the Christ light to one another and then carry our Christ light with us as we process down the hill. At times, the wind blows a candle out, nature contriving to send the light out into the world. Turn to the person near to us and the light is rekindled.

In the lower garden, we gather once again in a circle, having left our burning candles in pots set around a central fire. We share bread and wine, seeing the Christ in each other as we do. Once again, as with yesterday, I am deeply touched when looking into the eyes of another.

We end with a joyous round of the Allelujah chant by Mozart and warm, loving hugs given and received. Delicious!

After breakfast and a shower, I join with more people than I can count for the Easter Celebration in the Hall – Awakening to the New – held with so much love, care and inspiration by Barbara Swetina and Fay Barratt. We start with Findhorn community member Auriol de Smidt offering a poem she’s written about daffodils, her words powerfully evoking the joyous image of this bright yellow flower. And then, as one body, conference participants and community members sing and dance to greet the risen Christ. Through a guided meditation, we become Mary Magdalene in the garden outside the tomb, rejoicing when we see our beloved. To live music played by Kostantis Kourmadias on the saz, Laura Shannon dances the Flowering Cherry Tree, an Armenian lyrical dance that represents the sacred masculine, the sacred feminine, the union of both forces, and the resurrection of Christ’s wisdom. This is the highlight of the morning for me as Laura’s dancing is so incredibly beautiful.

As part of the celebration today, we sing Happy Birthday to Andrew Rivett who is 60 today! Yesterday, he shared with us his poem about not knowing, about understanding that he doesn’t understand. Mary waits outside the tomb, not knowing. How comfortable am I with not knowing?

In the afternoon Jeddah Mali reminds us that our essential nature is eternally expansive, light filled and harmonious – something we often misunderstand or forget. She believes that the time is now ripe for the expression of the example that Jesus lived of bringing the conscious light of being into matter. Our next step is to move forward into higher frequencies and to retain the full remembrance of being, while existing here in form.

To help us with this, Jeddah leads us into a meditation, in which we simply focus on our breath to bring ourselves fully present, fully into being. So simple, yet so powerful. I feel myself expanding upwards and outwards and when her calm voice calls us back, I find it takes me a little while to ground myself. She leaves us with the thought that when you smile to yourself, it is a form of remembering your essential nature. And when you smile at someone else, you ignite remembrance in them.

In the evening we are treated to story, song and Gaelic chant with Fionntulach. Having lived on the West Coast for almost ten years, I am familiar with the sound of Gaelic, but the Gaelic language that Fionntulach sings and chants in is older than present day Scots and Irish Gaelic. She has a gorgeous voice, and when she finishes singing us a chant from the 9th century, I feel a deep peace inside me.

Fionntulach talks with us about the Céile Dé, a Celtic Christian tradition to which she belongs. In it she has found a wealth of practices which support the transformation of consciousness and which sees Christ Consciousness as the constant, as the consciousness that will always ask to have the truth written in the heart. The virgin womb of the heart, suspended midway between heaven and earth. She asks us to imagine being pregnant with ourselves, being pregnant with the Christ, caring for the Christ in our heart, and even more so, caring for the Christ in another’s heart…

As the evening draws to a close, Fionntulach promises us a bedtime story, an ancient legend about Brida (Brighid). How she was exiled from Ireland as a baby, with only her mother’s blue mantle for protection, and came to be raised on the isle of Iona by the Druids. As a young woman, Brida is magically transported from the highest point on the island, Dun I, to the Holy Land, where she becomes Mary’s midwife. When the baby Jesus is born, Brida wraps him in her blue mantle, in the love that she herself was wrapped in when her mother said goodbye to her and held Brida in her arms for the last time. Awakening back on Iona, Brida thinks it all a dream, until she notices that her mantle is gone. The Druids don’t believe her story at first, until Brida reaches into her heart and pulls the Christ Light out into her hand.

From that day forward Brida walks the land carrying the light. We will one day meet her and her light will kindle ours and we will burn brightly…

Into Christ Consciousness Gathering – Day 3 (10 April 2012)

I am excited as I make my way to The Park this morning, knowing that we will start today with an attunement dance led by Susanne Anders Bartholomäi. We join hands and walk slowly to the rhythm of a song, gradually forming several circles around the candle centrepiece. To the music of Mozart, and through graceful gestures with which we connect heaven and earth through the opening of our hearts, we each find our way into a place of blissful peace. Ahhhhh…

On the first day of this gathering, we went through a process of what Philip Roderick referred to as kenosis – emptying ourselves, becoming ready to receive. Yesterday we were filled with as much Christ Consciousness as we individually, and collectively, could hold. Today we turn our attention out towards the world, to planetary transformation.

We spend the morning with William Meader, who talks with us of spiritual purpose, crisis, initiation, soul infusion and the Seven Rays. He explains that we are in a time of enormous transition, not just the astrological shift from Pisces to Aquarius, but from the Sixth Ray Age to the Seventh Ray Age. In the Alice Bailey tradition, from which William comes, we are approaching the First Initiation, the birth of Christ within the heart. Crisis is a prelude to all initiations, all expansions of consciousness. We each have to walk across the burning ground. William speaks of the people who stand in the middle of that ground, who are the bridge between those who intuitively know that dew-laden grass lies on the other side and are going for it, and those who are turning around to go back because their feet weren’t burning when they were back there. Those in the middle know that because we are all one, we can’t leave the others behind.

William goes on to talk about the soul as an agent of Christ, and about soul purpose. To know your soul ray is to know your purpose. There are seven rays, each with qualities, colours and musical notes associated with them. And there is an ashram associated with each ray, which is home for all the souls of that type. In the guided meditation that follows, William helps us to align with our ashram so that a seed can be planted for the manifestation of our soul’s purpose. Whether or not I truly aligned with my ashram, I’m not sure, but in the quiet time afterwards walking in the Original Garden, I am drawn to a Lady’s Mantle. A few days earlier, my partner had spoken about how the Lady’s Mantle still holds the dew long after it has disappeared from other plants. As I stand looking at the droplets of water on the leaves, I feel that something has landed in me and I trust that, in time, more will be revealed.

Another theme running through this gathering is the balancing of the polarities, in particular that of the male and the female, the masculine and the feminine. Because I have been looking at this within myself for quite some time now, it is only natural that I choose Fay Barratt’s workshop, She Speaks Through Us, a Magdalene Gathering. Just to say, there are many interesting, thought provoking and heart opening workshops on offer, and had the choice not been so clear for me, I can see myself wanting to be in several of them at the same time!

The centre table in the room in which we meet is decorated with a white candle, yellow and blue flowers, shimmering gold and purple fabrics, painted images of the Magdalene, and a pottery shell with a mixture of spikenard and rose essential oils. Divination cards, face down, create a border of soft orange roses around the table.

Fay talks of her relationship with the Magdalene and how she came to be doing these workshops. Each of us then shares what, if any, relationship we have with Mary Magdalene. And as we sit there, we become increasingly aware of the incredible energy in the room for which I have no words to describe. All l can say is that I’d happily stay in that energy forever.

Fay takes the oil mixture and anoints our right and left hands with it, the right hand representing the masculine and the left, the feminine. We are asked to sense each hand separately and note how they feel. Does one feel heavier than the other? Is the energy stronger in one than in the other? Starting with our hands apart, we ever so slowly bring them together, being aware of how their energies eventually blend. A symbol of the sacred marriage between the masculine and feminine. We then bless each other in whatever way feels appropriate, giving and receiving love as we go along.

The divination cards eventually play their part in deepening our understanding of ourselves and of connecting with another as we share our cards with a partner. We end the afternoon with a chant:

Power, power, your love is our power.
Power, power, our love is your power.
Oh Shekina, hear us calling, your children need healing.
Oh Shekina, hear us calling, your children need healing.

Tonight is Matthew Fox. Though I haven’t read any of his books, I have read articles he’s written, so I am thrilled that he is with us. The Universal Hall is packed. He has titled his talk, Our Emergence into Christ Consciousness: An Imperative for Our time. He muses about the similarity between the words emerging and emergency and makes the point that humans change when they have to – when there is an emergency. The current crisis we are in is causing us to tap into our divine nature.

Matthew speaks of Christ Consciousness as existing in every being and reads us a poem by Mary Oliver, The River Clarion. Through the words she has written, Mary tells us that if you want to know who the Christ Consciousness is, go sit by the river and listen. It is the flowing water, the stone at the water’s edge, the soft green moss covering the stone.

Christ Consciousness energy can be translated into generosity – love for the sake of loving, service for the sake of serving, work for the sake of working. In the dark night of the soul that our species is currently going through, we will undergo a purification of our desires. Consumerism will start to lose its grip on us.

Very inspiring is the work that Matthew is doing with young people who have left school before graduating. He has created what he calls his Doctor of Ministry programme. Based on the ten Cs, of which courage, compassion, creativity, critical thinking and contemplation are a part, he educates these young people in a way that is true to the meaning of the word education – he draws out the Christ Consciousness that is already there in each one of them. Matthew points out that through this type of education, adults too can be woken up.

Not surprisingly, Matthew is given a standing ovation when he finishes.

Into Christ Consciousness Gathering – Day 4 (11 April 2012)

Today is the last day of the gathering and I am riding high on the loving, expansive energy that has been filling our group chalice since dawn on Sunday. I know I’m not the only one affected in this way, as the conversations between my fellow participants are exceptionally lively this morning. Sitting down, I imagine that the sound I hear in the Hall is similar in quality to what one might hear in a beehive!

Though it could be said we’re on the last leg of the journey, our ending is actually a beginning. Our focus in these next hours together is on empowering ourselves for going out into the world to offer our best intentions and endeavours to the one life in all its forms.

The first part of this morning, we enter into a ritual of intent and dedication. To welcome us, and remind us of the vast and beautiful cosmos of which we are a part, we are treated to a stunning audio-visual piece composed of images taken in space and set to the music of Karl Jenkins’ Benedictus, from The Armed Man – A Mass for Peace.

Three lovely children are with us to represent the future generations; a small apple sapling, which will bless the new Dunelands housing development, represents natural life and reminds us of the bounty of the earth and the many fruits of our own lives. The unseen beings are invited to be present, to bear witness and to bless our ritual. The star overhead is our guide.

Words from the ritual:

May we be open to the presence of the Christ, and be willing to merge in true communion with this love. In so doing, the revelation that was initiated 2000 years ago will take a step further towards unfolding and we will then be in a position to demonstrate the reality of one Earth, one humanity, one life, and be ready to take our place as part of one cosmos. We remember the story of the universe and slowly we realise we are the universe itself, reflecting on itself.

Today we represent the grass roots community of humanity, embracing the consciousness which we are calling Christ Consciousness that is arising within us, and we come together in deep appreciation and awe of the mystery of being.

Auriol de Smidt shares with us her poem Rising and Barbara Swetina leads us in a Taize chant. We then stand and make the commitment to know ourselves as one humanity, one world, one divinity expressed in myriad forms. With a gong roll and the sounding of an Om, our commitment is anchored within each one of us.

To bless the ritual, and the next steps in our human emergence, Matthew Fox leads us in opening the Seven Directions (north, east, south west, above, below and the heart), and in walking the Navaho Beauty Prayer, a prayer that acknowledges the beauty that is all around us every day.

Having dedicated ourselves to opening to Christ Consciousness, we then ponder with William Bloom the possibility of us being the Collective Messiah. Borrowing an idea from Thich Nhat Hanh, William explains that the next Buddha/Messiah may come in the form of a group or community rather than as a single person. But how do we do the Collective Messiah? What are the mechanics? William explains that it’s actually quite simple. Open your heart, relax your body a little bit, connect, and recognise that I’m in you, you’re in me, spirit is in us and we are in spirit. Cultivate being awake, present, witnessing and compassionate. The Collective Messiah happens when we are an embodied sensation of love. And the really good news from William is that we can multi-task – we can do neurotic human being and embody love!

We then create what’s known as a Fishbowl where a small group will have a conversation in front of the rest of us while we listen. William extends an invitation for 12 participants – anyone who feels he/she really understands/has experienced what he has been talking about – to come down and sit in the circle of chairs. Spoken about is our fear to be ourselves, to be seen, to live true to ourselves. One woman speaks of the need to have courageous humility, of being open to everyone without assumptions of who is, and who isn’t, awake. And there are stories of compassionate action taken for the sake of others.

For the first part of the afternoon, we are invited to take part in small groups centred around topics of our choosing. All in all there are 21 thought-provoking topics to choose from, with the possibility for each of us to be part of two groups over the course of the session. I chose ‘How do we bring the divine to each other in everyday life?’ and ‘The False God of Perfection’. On first glance, it may seem that these two are unrelated. However, when I am worshiping at the altar of the god of perfection – judging myself and others as not being good enough – then I’m not able to be present, to bring the divine to another through my expression of love.

The second part of the afternoon is devoted to a completion ceremony in which we set an individual intent. Gillian Paschkes-Bell leads us in a guided meditation and we are helped in our endeavour by the ancient sounds of the saz and frame drum as played by Kostantis Kourmadias and Laura Shannon respectively. Then, accompanied by the sublime tones of the hang drum as played by Philip Roderick, we anoint one another with essential oils diluted in a blend of waters from Findhorn, Glastonbury and Iona. There is something so very special about honouring each other in this way.

Gillian guides us in closing the directions opened by Matthew this morning, and in thanking the unseen beings for their presence with us. Barbara then leads us in a song, the words of which I’d like to share with you here:

Christ has no body now on Earth but yours,
No hands but yours, no feet but yours.
Yours are the eyes through which he pours out, compassion to the world.
Yours are his hands blessing me now,
All praise to the One.

The last act of the afternoon is a Findhorn tradition where the centre candle lit during one conference is blown out and passed to the organiser(s) of the next conference. In this case, Gillian passed the beautiful blue and green candle, a gift from the Erraid community, to Michael Hawkins and Antonio Palmieri, the organisers of the Love, Magic, Miracles conference being held in the autumn of this year.

We all then give Gillian and Janice, and all those who have been involved in creating and sustaining the Into Christ Consciousness Gathering, a standing ovation.

From the bottom of my heart, I thank you all for what I have received through taking part in this gathering. In the days to come, I trust that the pieces will fall into place more and more. I look forward to the unfolding.

Sandra Mitchell

[This diary was first published on the Findhorn Foundation website – www.findhorn.org. We thank the Findhorn Foundation for the permission to reproduce it here.]