The Findhorn Garden

THE NATURE SPIRITS

The experiences I am writing about here were personal ones and enough to convince me of the reality of the beings or entities know as Nature Spirits. I cannot prove this reality to the satisfaction of the scientist who will only accept what is demonstrable at will and, of course, one person’s experiences may not be convincing to someone who has not had similar ones. While it is important to accept only what is felt to be true for oneself, it is unwise to reject what may be new or unusual without careful consideration. The open mind is wisdom at all times.

A word about my early training. If I can give some idea of how my mind works it may make it easier to assess the value of this account. It became clear at an early age that my inclination was towards science and at school science and mathematics were my best subjects. I built up a workshop and laboratory in one of the attic rooms of our house – to the alarm of some of the neighbours who were sure I would blow the place up! During the last year and a half of the first world war I served as a radio operator on a transport in the Channel and when I returned home after the armistice I became an enthusiastic radio experimenter.

I studied physics, chemistry and mathematics at Edinburgh University for three years. Unfortunately a serious illness which began three weeks before my final degree examination prevented me from finishing the course and taking up science as a career. But the training had not been wasted; it was, in fact, invaluable as it developed the analytical side of my mind as well as the ability for objective observation and logical reasoning which makes me question everything that happens and try to find an explanation of the why and how.

In my early twenties I began to take an interest in what is now called parapsychology. I was not in those days what might be called a sensitive. I had no experience of clairvoyance or clairaudience but had examples of telepathic communication which led me to accept it as fact though at that time my mind was working along materialistic lines looking for purely physical explanations of all that happened. I found this increasingly impossible and was forced to broaden my outlook. I had to accept the fact that there were some things which could not be proved physically, which could not be demonstrated in the laboratory or repeated at will, and yet were real phenomena.

Perhaps I should also mention that though I have imagination it is neither vivid nor fantastic. I find it difficult to write about anything I have not actually experienced. I am certain I could not have made up the fantastic things that have happened to me.
An important fact is that I lived in the country for ten years. Born and brought up in Edinburgh I always thought of myself as the complete town dweller until for health reasons my doctor advised – in fact insisted – that I should leave town and live in the country for a time. I rented an ex-gamekeeper’s cottage on the Strathord Estate in Perthshire.

It was isolated, built on a small hill and almost surrounded by a wood of beautiful old trees (mainly elms) on a strip of land between three farms. I lived a simple back-to-nature life – a marked contrast to my previous life in town.

By this time I had had certain paranormal experiences of various kinds but had not made contact with or seen any Nature Spirits. Nor during the ten years I lived in the country was I aware of any such contact, but I am now certain that it was then that the close link I now have with nature was formed.

Having sketched in these necessary preliminaries I come now to what happened in the Botanic Gardens in Edinburgh about the middle of March 1966. Edinburgh possesses fine Botanic Garden of considerable extent containing many varieties of trees, shrubs and plants. They are not far away from the flat where I live and I visit them often. It was a glorious day and I went to the Gardens in the afternoon. I wandered about for a while enjoying the beauty and the peace and then went along a path that skirts the north side of Inverleith House which is in the centre of the Gardens and is now Edinburgh’s Modern Art Gallery. Leaving the path I crossed a considerable expanse of grass which was dotted with trees and bushes to a seat under a tall tree. The back of the seat was almost touching the trunk of the tree so that when I sat down I could lean my shoulders and the back of my head against the tree.

All my life I have had a great love for trees and a feeling of affinity with them, in spite of being mainly a town dweller. They are living things and nothing delights me more than wandering about in forests or woods talking to the trees. I became identified in some way with this tree I was sitting under; I was aware of the rising of the sap in the trunk and of the infinitely slow growth of the roots below me. There was a heightening of awareness and a feeling of expectation: something was going to happen, I did not know what. I felt very wide awake and full of energy. There was a tension in the air, almost as if the air itself were beginning to shimmer. I sat there in utter contentment.

Suddenly I saw a figure dancing around a tree about twenty-five yards away from me, a beautiful little figure about three feet tall. I saw with astonishment that it was a faun, the Greek mythological being, half human, half animal. He had shaggy legs ending in cloven hooves, pointed ears and chin and two little horns on his forehead. His skin was light brown. I looked at him in amazement and even did the obvious; I pinched myself. I was awake. I wondered for a moment if it were a boy made up in some way, but obviously in was not – the cloven hooves were too definite even at that distance. This was some strange creature the like of which I had never seen before. Hallucination? No, it was much too real. He was as distinct as any of the people in the garden. A mental abberation? I did not think so. Suddenly it seemed natural. Why should I not accept it? Here was something wonderful, something exciting. I stopped trying to explain it away and watched the little being with delight. He danced across to another tree and after going round it two or three times went to a third tree and then danced towards me. He stood for a moment looking at me and then sat down cross-legged in front of me. I looked at him; he was very real. No doubt I was not seeing him with my physical sense of sight though when I closed my eyes he was not there. I leant forward and said: “Hallo.” Startled he leapt to his feet and stared at me.
Faun “Can you see me?”
Roc “Yes.”
Faun “I don’t believe it. Humans can’t see us.”
Roc “Apparently some can.”
Faun “What am I like?”
I described him. He danced about in front of me, pirouetting round. Faun “What am I doing?”
I told him. Still looking astonished, he said:
Faun “You must be seeing me.”
He danced across to the seat beside me, sat down, turned towards me and looking up said:
Faun “Why are human beings so stupid?”

I may in some way some ways be overpersonalising this being. No doubt the communication between us took place on a mental level by means of thought transference probably in the form of images and symbols. My mind would automatically put into words what came from him to me. I certainly spoke to him, but I am not sure whether I did it mentally or aloud. The exchange is best put in the form of dialogue which is what it appeared to me to be. There is the possibility of colouration coming from my own mind, but I am on the look-out for it and try to guard against it. I was trained as an objective observer, have a good memory and do not tend to exaggerate things. To the best of my belief I am setting down exactly what happened.

To get back to his question: “Why are human beings so stupid?” In what way stupid? In many ways. Why do they wrap themselves up in strange coverings? Why do they not go about in a natural state as he did? I told him the coverings were called clothes and that we wear them for protection, for warmth and because it is not considered right to go without. This he could not understand. We talked of houses and motor cars, which he called boxes on wheels in which foolish human beings dashed about sometimes bumping into each other. Was it a game?

He told me he lived in the gardens. This is a partial truth as he is an inhabitant of another plane of existence as well. His work was to help the growth of the trees. He also told me that many of the Nature Spirits have lost interest in the human race since they have been made to feel that they are neither believed in nor wanted.
Faun “If you humans think you can get along without us – just try.”
Roc “Some of us do believe in you and want your help. I do, for one.”
The wonderful thing to me in this meeting was the companionship. I felt an amazing harmony between us; a communication was taking place that did not need to be put into words. We sat until I realised that it was time for me to go home.
Faun “Call me when you return to the Gardens and I will come to you.” He told me his name was Kurmos. I asked him if he could visit me.
Faun “Yes, if you invite me.”
Roc “I do. I shall be delighted if you will come and see me.” Faun “You do believe in me?”
Roc “Yes, of course I do!”
Faun “And you like us?”
Roc “Yes. I have much affection for the Nature Spirits.” This was true though he was the first one I had actually seen. Faun “Then I’ll come now.”

We walked to the West Gate of the Gardens, out into Arboretum Road and through the streets of Edinburgh back to my flat. I was amused at the thought of the sensation it might have caused had this strange and delightful little faun been as visible to the passers-by as he was to me.

He came into the flat with me. I have a large collection of books and my front room is lined with bookshelves. He showed great interest. What were they and why so many? I told him they contained ideas, speculations, facts, theories, accounts of past events, stories invented by the writers and so on; all of which were put into print and made up into books which could be read by others.
Why? You can get all the knowledge you want by just wanting it. I told him that few human beings could do that wonderful thing – yet. We had to be content to get our knowledge from other people or from books.

Again we spent some time in wonderful harmony and then he said he must return to the Gardens. The door of the room was open and he walked out into the hall. I followed him and, possibly because he looked so solid and real, I opened the door of the flat. He went out onto the landing and I watched him run lightly down the stairs. As he reached the bottom he faded out.

This was an astonishing experience which I feel sure I could not have imagined. What puzzled me was, why a faun? I had not been reading any Greek mythology for some years.

Several times after that he appeared beside me when I went to the Gardens and called to him. I did not want to ask him questions; the wonderful harmony and companionship were enough, though I knew that here was infinite nature wisdom – combined with the naivety of a child. I did not want to ask questions; what was right for me to know would be given to me in time.

I did not know that this was going to lead to something even more unusual which took place over a month later at the end of April. I had been to visit friends who lived on the south side of the town. It was after eleven o-clock at night and I was walking home. I had reached the Mound which is the steet joining the old and new towns. It runs from the Hight Street to the middle of Princes Street in a double curve. On the left side is the castle perched on its rock above the railway and West Princes Street Gardens.

On the right, at the foot of the street, are two Greek-like buildings, the Royal Scottish Academy facing Princes Street and immediately behind it the National Gallery, the Scott Monument and East Gardens. It was a beautiful night and there were few people about. There is a fine view over Edinburgh from the Mound and I was thinking how peaceful it all looked at the moment.

I had spent an interesting evening and was thinking over some of the subjects we had talked about.

Suddenly, as I turned the corner onto the last part of the street which runs down the side of the National Gallery, I walked into an extraordinary ‘atmosphere’. I had never before encountered anything like it. It was as if I had no clothes on and was walking through a medium more dense than air but not so dense as water. I could feel it against my body. It produced a sensation like a mixture of pins and needles and an electric shock and there was a suggestion of cobwebs brushing against my skin. It is difficult to describe.

I again had the feeling of heightened awareness and of expectation. As I approached the front of the National Gallery I was aware of a figure walking beside me, a figure taller than I am. It was a faun radiating a tremendous power. I glanced at him. Surely this was not my little faun suddenly grown up? It was not. We walked on, turning into the space between two buildings. He turned his head and looked at me.
Faun “Well, aren’t you afraid of me?”
Roc “No.”
Faun “Why not? All human beings are afraid of me.”
Roc “I feel no evil in your presence. I see no reason why you should want to harm me. I do not feel afraid.
Faun “Do you know who I am?”
I did at that moment.
Roc “You are the great god Pan.”
Pan “Then you ought to be afraid. Your word ‘panic’ comes from the fear my presence causes.”
Roc “Not always. I am not afraid.”
Pan “Can you give me a reason?”
Roc “It may be because of my feeling of affinity with your subjects, the earth spirits and woodland creatures.”
Pan “You believe in my subjects?”
Roc “Yes.”
Pan “Do you love my subjects?”
Roc “Yes, I do.”
Pan “In that case, do you love me?”
Roc “Why not?”
Pan “Do you love me?”
Roc “Yes.”
He looked at me oddly with a strange smile and a glint in his eyes. He had deep, mysterious brown eyes.
Pan “You know, of course, that I’m the devil? You have just said you love the devil.”
Roc “No. You are not the devil. You are the god of the woodlands and the country-side. There is no evil in you. You are Pan.”
Pan “Did the Christian Church not take me as a model for the devil? Look at my cloven hooves, my shaggy legs and the horns on my forehead.”
Roc “The Church turned all pagan gods and spirits into devils, fiends and imps.”
Pan “Was the Church wrong, then?”
Roc “The Church did it with the best intentions from its own point of view. But it was wrong. The ancient gods are not necessarily devils.”
We crossed Princes Street and turned right towards South St. David Street. As we turned into this street:
Pan “What do I smell like?”
Since he joined me I had been aware of a wonderful scent of pine woods, of damp leaves, of newly turned earth and of woodland flowers. I told him. Pan “Don’t I smell rank, like a goat?”
Roc “No, you don’t. There is a faint musk-like animal smell, like the fur of a healthy cat. It is pleasant – almost like incense. Are you still claiming to be the devil?”
Pan “I have to find out what you think of me. It’s important.” Roc “Why?”
Pan “For a reason.”
Roc “Won’t you tell me what it is?”
Pan “Not now. It will become apparent in time.”
We walked on and crossed the end of George Street. Pan was walking very close beside me.
Pan “You don’t mind me walking beside you?”
Roc “Not in the least.”
He put his arm round my shoulder and I felt the physical contact. I was much aware of his physical presence.
Pan “You don’t mind if I touch you?”
Roc “No.”
Pan “You really feel no repulsion, no fear?”
Roc “None.”
Pan “Excellent.”

I could not think why he was making this determined effort to get a sign of fear from me. I am making no claims to being a brave man; I am not. There are many things that could scare me out of my life. But, for some reason or another, this being did not inspire me with fear. I felt awe because of his power but not fear – only love.

I did not know then that for his purpose Pan had to find someone who showed no fear of him. He is a great being and people may feel uneasy in his presence because of the awe he inspires, but there ought to be no fear. “All human beings are afraid of me.” He had not said this as a threat but with sadness. “Did the Christian Church not take me as a model for the devil?” That is why Pan is feared; because of the image that has been projected onto him. As most human beings instinctively fear the devil, the fear they feel is transferred onto Pan because of the association. This image must be lifted off him so that his true nature is restored. This was why he had to find someone who did not fear him.

We turned into Queen Street and as we passed the Post Office I asked him where his pan-pipes were. He smiled at the question. “I do have them, you know.” And there he was, holding the pipes between his hands. He began to play a curious melody. I had heard it in woods before and I have often heard it since but it is elusive and I cannot remember it afterwards.

When we reached the downstairs front door of the flat he disappeared but when I came into the house I had a strong feeling that he was there though I could not see him.

This strange encounter made a strong impression on me. I had no idea why it had happened or why this being had chosen to show himself to me, but it looked as if the meeting with the little faun in the Botanic Gardens had been a preliminary meeting. I felt certain that neither of the beings was imaginary; they were much too real and what imagination I have is more practical than fantastic.

The next significant meeting was early in May on Iona in the Hermit’s Cell, which is a ring of stones, all that is left of the cell where Columba used to go in retreat. It is about half way across the island almost on a level with the Abbey. I was there with two friends (Peter and Kathy). I was standing in the centre of the ring facing in the direction of the Abbey which was hidden from sight by rising ground. In front of me was a grassy slope and I became aware of a large figure lying in the ground – right in the ground. I could see him through the grass. It was a monk in a brown habit with the hood pulled over the head so that I could not see the features. His feet were towards me.

As I watched he raised his hands and rolled back the hood. It was Pan. He rose up out of the ground and stood facing me, an immense figure at least twenty-five feet tall. As he did so, the habit fell away. He was smiling and he said:

“I am a servant of Almighty God and I and my subjects are willing to come to the aid of mankind in spite of the way he has treated us and abused nature, if he affirms belief in us and asks for our help.”

I knew then that this was the beginning of a reconciliation between Pan, the Nature Spirits and man.

The next encounter of importance was at Attingham Park, the Shropshire Adult College in September 1966, where I had been attending a weekend course with some friends. Before leaving on the Monday morning I was prompted to go along what is known as the Mile Walk. I walked by the river until I came to the huge cedar tree with a seat round it at a bend in the river. To the left of the tree is the beginning of the Rhododendron Walk. I was alone and I sat on the seat enjoying the view up the river. After a time I rose and went into the walk. As I did so I felt a great build-up of power and an increase in awareness to a high degree. Colours and forms bcame more significant. I was aware or every single leaf on the bushes and trees, of every blade of grass on the path, standing out with startling clarity. It was as if physical reality had become much more real than it normally is, and the three-dimensional effect we are used to had become even more solid – a strange sharpening of vision. It is an overwhelming experience when it happens and nearly impossible to describe in words. It is a thing one must experience for oneself to understand fully. I had the impression of complete reality with all that lies within and beyond it immediately imminent. The sense of awe and wonder this produced is not easy to convey. There was an acute feeling of being one with nature in a complete way as well as being one with the Divine which produced great exultation.

I was aware of Pan walking by my side and of a strong bond between us. He stepped behind me and then walked into me so that we became one and I saw the surroundings through his eyes. At the same time part of me – the recording, observing part – stood aside. This was not a form of possession but of identification.

The moment he stepped into me the woods were alive with myriads of beings, elementals, nymphs, dryads, fauns, elves, gnomes, fairies and so on, far too numerous to catalogue. They varied in size from tiny little beings a fraction of an inch in height – like the ones I saw swarming about on a clump of toadstools – to beautiful elfin creatures three or four feet tall. Some of them danced round me in a ring; all were welcoming and full of rejoicing. The Nature Spirits love and delight in the work they do and have to express this in movement.

I felt as if I were outside time and space. Everything was happening in the now. It is impossible to give more than a faint impression of the actuality of this experience but I would stress the exultation and the feeling of joy and delight. In spite of the intense exhilaration there was an underlying peace, contentment and a sense of spiritual presence. This is of importance and due to the unity being brought about between man, the Nature Spirits, the fundamental cosmic energies and the spiritual forces – all becoming One within the Divine Mind.

I found myself in a clearing at the end of this part of the walk where there is a great oak tree. I turned and walked back the way I had come. I now had pan-pipes in my hands and was aware of shaggy legs and cloven hooves. I began to dance down the path playing the pipes – the melody I had heard Pan play. The numerous birds responded, their songs making an exquisite counterpoint to the music of the pipes. All the nature beings were active, many dancing as they worked. When I had almost reached the spot where the experience had started the heightened awareness began to fade and Pan withdrew leaving me once more my ordinary self. I stopped dancing and walked on. This was just as well as there was a boy sitting on the seat under the cedar tree. It might have been disconcerting if I had come dancing out of the path playing, no doubt to him, the invisible pipes!

I include one other experience which took place in the public gardens at St. Annes-on-Sea later the same year, as it gave confirmation of what was happening. On the afternoon of Wednesday 12th October during the second of a series of meetings held in Liebie Pugh’s flat in St. George’s Square (Universal Link), at which certain tapes were to be played, I was directed to remain outside in the gardens opposite the flat. I went to the pond at one end of the gardens and stood by the wooden fence. I was at once aware of Pan standing beside me. As had happened at Attingham, he stepped into me and I became one with him. Again a recording and observing part of me stood aside. This compound being – Pan and myself – called on all the Nature Spirits to gather together and help in what was to take place. The island in the pond, the ground round it, the pond itself and all the bushes and trees were alive with beings of many different kinds such as I had seen at Attingham.

I – or should I say “we” – walked by winding paths onto a raised part of the garden from which it was possible to look across the street into Liebie’s room which was on the first floor. There were again pan-pipes in my hands and I, or rather Pan within me, called on the green ray of the nature forces to rise up through the house like sap rising up a tree trunk.

The green ray responded, rising slowly up the building until it emerged from the roof. There it was met by a descending magenta ray which blended with it producing a band of blue-green colour.

After some time Pan withdrew and I knew that the objective had been achieved. I left the gardens and returned to Peter’s car which was parked in the square. About five minutes later Peter came over from the house and startled me by saying that Pan had been in the room and had spoken to Kathleen Fleming who was present. Kathleen described what occurred as follows:
“Pan stood on my right side towering above me, a being of great beauty and majesty. He spoke firmly and quickly. The gist of his message was that people had, through their thinking, given him both a character and image that is untrue.

“He told me that he is one of God’s servants, the Lord of the nature forces, and he begged the human race to co-operate with the Nature Spirits to harmonise the different kingdoms with the Will of God. As a demonstration of the energy he is wielding for God he described how he could gather up the substance of the mountains in an instant and wrap it round him as a cloak.

“The love I felt for him was deep and abiding.”

It turned out that all the others present (sixteen in number) had almost without exception had visions or impressions connected with nature.

These are probably the most significant of my meetings with the god Pan. I have been aware of him many times since and have also seen or been aware of a variety of Nature Spirits and am able to communicate with them. These have what may be called “light” bodies which are to some extent formless and very tenuous, like coloured luminous clouds of many different and beautiful colours which keep constantly changing. They often have myriads of fine flowing lines, frequently golden, which shape themselves into changing patterns. They are unbelievably beautiful and almost impossible to depict, our material colours not being pure enough.

In their “light” bodies, which are really whirls of energy, these beings could not work with the trees, bushes, flowers, vegetables and so on. In order to do this they have to take on lower bodies probably of etheric substance. In this way they become personalised, as the forms they take on have mainly been created by man in his legends, myths and fairy tales and they use these forms so that they may be recognised by man when they show themselves to him.

It is unfortunate that, due to the materialism of the nineteenth century and the subsequent disbelief of the present age, man tends to dismiss anything that cannot be seen, touched and analysed in the laboratory as non-existent – so these wonderful beings are considered to be pure imagination. There is hope in the fact that nuclear physics is being led to the possibility that matter may have no real existence but is a build-up of whirls and vortices of energy and that material things which are supposed to be the only true reality have no actual existence. Does not the ever growing reading public for J. R. R. Tolkien’s “Lord of the Rings” and for the children’s stories by C.S. Lewis and Alan Garner point to a returning belief in non-physical beings? Of course, people will say that there is all the difference between fiction and real life. But what is so-called real life? What is reality?

Pan takes on the form imposed upon him by the Greek myth, half human, half animal. It is the right form for him as it is symbolical of the union of intellect, represented by the human upper part, with the powerful, mysterious, intense forces of nature represented by the lower part; forces not found in human consciousness.

At Findhorn the ultimate aim is the complete co-operation between the three kingdoms; the devas, the Nature Spirits and man. This may be a long term project but it is well on its way to realisation though the balance is still delicate.

The devas, who are angelic beings, I believe to be the architects. They design the archetypal patterns which the various trees, plants, flowers and so on are to take. They also channel energy. The Nature Spirits are the builders; they build the etheric forms to the plans and transform the energies to the kinds required. The material growth takes place within this etheric counterpart and conforms to it. Of course, this is nonsense to the orthodox scientist who will maintain that the whole plan of a tree or flwer is in the seed, in the genetic code in the DNA molecules. But can we be certain that the DNA molecule itself has no etheric counterpart with perhaps elemental beings working within it? Could it replicate itself without such a counterpart?

It is important for the future of mankind that belief in the Nature Spirits and their god Pan is re-established and that they are seen in their true light and not misunderstood. These beings, in spite of the outrages man has committed against nature, in too many ways to list, are only too pleased to help him if he will seek and ask for their co-operation. They must be believed in with complete sincerity and faith. They must never be taken for granted and should be given love and thanks for the work they do.
With such co-operation what could be achieved would seem miraculous to many. It has been sought and asked for at Findhorn and, as the results show, has been given. Bur there are some of the Nature Spirits who have been alienated by man’s outrages against nature and by his disbelief who are still hostile and unwilling to help a being who seems to be a parasite on the face of the earth bent on destroying everything he touched and unable to live in friendship with himself. Let us try to win them over by convincing them that this is not true. In spite of self-interest, selfishness and short-sightedness most of the antagonism has been brought about by ignorance and stupidity rather than intention.

Let us try to make friends with these wonderful beings and ask their help in making the earth in this New Age a really beautiful and perfect place.

 

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